What Not To Say

….to someone with depression.

Smile! *insert inane grin from the person saying it*

What’s wrong with you?

What crawled up your arse and died?

Chin up.

You’ll be alright.

Take some Rescue Remedy.

What’s up, now?

You have nothing to be depressed about.

Get over yourself.

Why are youย being such a bitch?

Stop being so selfish.

What have you got to be so unhappy about?

Oh, I read an interesting article in the Daily Mail about depression, it said….. *stops listening*

Tell me what’s wrong.

Just tell me what’s wrong.


Cheer up!

Get a grip.

You never know, it might never happen!

Happy mums have happy babies.

Oh my daaays, I was so depressed last night when the fit one got kicked off X Factor!

Have a drink, you’ll feel better.

Have another drink, you’ll feel much better.

Have a line, that’ll help.

Have another line, that’ll really help.

Oh I bought you this self help book that – *stops listening*

Stop being so negative.

Do you want to be unhappy?

Listen to this Radiohead song!

You emo.

I found these supplements for you, they’re supposed to help withย –ย *stops listening*

You miserable cow.

Let’s go SHOPPING! That’ll take your mind off of it!

You’re so fucked up.

Ugh, I can’t win can I?

A problem shared is a problem halved!

I had depression one time, I – *stops listening*


Why don’t you just go and kill yourself?

What To Say To Someone With Depression:

It’s OK.

Same here.

I’m here if you want to talk.

I understand.

Write it down.

Do you need anything?

I know.

Do you need some help?

I’m not going anywhere.

I’m listening.


  1. Hear hear! I suffer from depression too, give us a shout if you want to vent etc x

  2. Becca_Masters October 1, 2012

    So very true.
    Add to that list – here’s my number, call anytime.

  3. Dummymummy October 1, 2012

    LOVE this!
    Now to get my other half to read it and take note…

    • MummyNeverSleeps October 1, 2012

      haha, I know, maybe write some on post-its and hide them around the house? thank you for reading! ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. Get a Grip happens to be my mums favourite saying #ARGH

  5. lilandrael October 1, 2012

    I can’t count the amount of times I’ve heard “What’s wrong with you.” The worst thing is, most of that time, you don’t even know yourself. It’s not like depression comes with a hand-guide. Although something like “The Hitch-hikers Guide To Depression” would be awesome.

    • MummyNeverSleeps October 1, 2012

      Exactly. There IS no reason, that’s what people can’t understand. And it totally would! I’ll get to it! Thank you for reading darling xx

  6. WallyMummy October 1, 2012

    All sounds far too true… does this come in print out form?? ๐Ÿ™‚ x

    • MummyNeverSleeps October 1, 2012

      Ooh that’s a good idea! I’ll start fly-postering it all over the land! ๐Ÿ˜€

  7. Notmyyearoff October 1, 2012

    Wow, sometimes people can be tactless can’t they?

  8. Lisa @ motherhoodormadness October 2, 2012

    I understand.

  9. The Kraken October 2, 2012

    Darling, I love what you have written here! Love it. I wrote something just like this on my own blog a while ago about what not to say to me when I’m up to my arse in suicidal tendencies. You can check it out here if you fancy it:

    • MummyNeverSleeps October 2, 2012

      Thank you for reading sweetheart ๐Ÿ™‚ Read yours, and loved it!

  10. irenefitz October 2, 2012

    Agree with both lists entirely. ๐Ÿ™‚

  11. Mummy Glitzer October 2, 2012

    My husband’s favourite is “Get out and go for a walk/go to a playgroup”. Well yes in theory that’s what I should do, in practise depression and anxiety rarely permit it! Fab post. Xx

    • MummyNeverSleeps October 3, 2012

      Aha the old chesnut of get some fresh air / some exercise! Yeah, nice thought but doesn’t really work does it? Ha, thank you sweetheart xx

  12. Me, Myself and I ~ Dawn October 3, 2012

    The one that really bugs me is when people say “Well you don’t look depressed” argh I could scream then!!! It’s a mask that I wear most of the time to cover up how I feel,

    Could I add a link to this post please I’m in the middle of writing a post about my depression, and you say it so much better than i can xx

    • MummyNeverSleeps October 3, 2012

      *nods* Or the “But you’ve been fiiiiine! Where has this come from?!” Some people, eh? It really suprises me that such high percentages of people have had or still have depression and these kinds of comments are still made!! Thank you for reading darling, and of course you can link back – and don’t be daft, whatever you write is absolutely relevant!! xx

  13. Kat October 3, 2012

    Brilliant! My personal favourites:
    I’m sure if you eat something you’ll feel much better
    What YOU need is a good nights sleep
    Have a shower and smarten yourself up a bit, you’ll be surprised at the difference it makes
    Just keep takin the pills love
    And finally,
    Go for a walk and get some fresh air, blow the cobwebs away
    My lovely cousin said ” if you need anything at all just shout, we are only down the road (she lives 2 hours away!)”
    Great post lovely xxx

    • MummyNeverSleeps October 3, 2012

      Doesn’t really help when you’re having a mini breakdown at 3am and need someone there NOW!! Ha, I dunno, maybe I’ll start printing this list off and sticking em on lamposts etc ๐Ÿ˜€ thank you so much for reading xxx

  14. The Inexpert October 14, 2012

    Oh I have experienced some over the years:
    โ€ข I read this article about coffee drinkers *stopped listening*
    โ€ข You have to read this great book on *stopped listening*
    โ€ข You don’t look depressed (as someone already wrote).
    โ€ข When I was … (usually my mother) *stopped listening*


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